December 2010
61 posts
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To have, to hold, to love, to keep. The going got tough and your letters are swimming with the fishes. The ocean at night; the rainforest at sunrise; the loneliness of tequila sunsets; the sweet salt water scent of two new bodies, together in the sand, under a starless night… these things I will recall. I cried into my drink when I heard your voice, but some things are not mine, nor should...
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We came to the conclusion, finally, that it is best to sell the diamond ring off. I might regret this one day, but today, I see no use for it except to pad my wallet.
I am leaving for Puerto Rico in the morning and the only reason I don’t want to go is that I’m scared of losing phone reception…
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A little early, but since I'll be out of the...
Resolutions
Be patient in all things.
Forgive, but most importantly, forget.
Find joy in all I do.
Remember to never forget my own insignificance.
Understand that the universe is busy, busy, busy.
Smile as often as possible.
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The Ghost by Deer Tick.
I want to recite more poetry to you.
“If I knew that today would be the last time I’d see you, I would hug you tight...”
– Gabriel García Márquez
State of the Union
Things I Love Lately:
Your voice, even if it is over the phone.
Fresh snow.
Booties.
Apple Cider.
Carols.
Paste-up.
Sleeping alone.
Being spontaneous.
Genomes.
Dressing people.
Cookie decorating.
Jazz clubs.
Swimsuit shopping.
Personal narratives.
Not wearing eyeliner.
Layers.
Printing pictures.
Buying nondenominational holiday presents.
Brideshead Revisited.
Things I...
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All these people are apologizing, for all these things they did, and though I accept it and say I forgive them, I never do. The person that truly needs to apologize has yet to do so.
Tyler: We're making a pilgrimage to see you.
Me: I feel like a religious site.
Tyler: You are.
Me: When one enters me, they find God.
Anonymous asked: Who is your muse?
Anonymous asked: who is the "you" you write about?
“Put your ear to the sky and listen my darling, everything whispers I love you.”
– Jason Anderson’s “Christmas”.
I miss my pattern of self-destructive behavior, it made dealing with the thought of you infinitely easier.
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Learned Your Name by Frightened Rabbit.
I had a dream that you came to my rescue.
Anonymous asked: What ideas do you have for DIY/handmade Christmas cards?
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Opening Frame
Her fingers are long, regal in design, powerful from practice, they glide, dance upon the surface of the keys. Every night she keeps her own rhythm, her wedding ring providing the percussion for her ballads. Everything bewitched her, all sounds, all meter, all harmony. The lull of goodbyes in dulcet tones stole from her all reason, all comprehension. She was born with wild hair, dark eyes, pale...
Feeling Good by Nina Simone.
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Not Miserable by Frightened Rabbit.
Time heals all wounds and obscures all memories. Looking back, now, on all the heartfelt pleas I sent you to acknowledge me, to forgive me for whatever I may have done, to say one thing in days, I realize that you tormented me. You took my words away, and of all the things you took without consent, that was the one that truly defined my being. I’m happy for you, truly, I am. Maybe my...
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I know you are not for me because you shamelessly post rough demos of the songs I dedicated to you… everyone knows the album version is better.
“Don’t you see the chimneys? Don’t you hear the fires? That’s...”
– A survivor of Auschwitz rehashing what she was told upon her arrival at the camp.
Nothing is more a part of me than my religion, and what it means to be here, alive.
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redsuspenders asked: hey lil girl
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This Year:
January: First encounters. February: Heavy promises. March: Birth of regrets. April: Yours, entirely. May: Forgotten. June: Discoveries. July: Sweet sounds. August: Turmoil. September: Heartache. October: Letting loose. November: Finding a winner. December: Acceptance.
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I want to tear you apart with my bare hands.
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All that screaming and back scratching, all those hours of burning palms and frostbitten fingers. Searching and hurting, breaking and caressing. All for warmth with the covers thrown off and the internal metronome of a heartbeat. What use had we for cloth or rest, what use had we for time? These things, we said, served only to weigh us down.
Every dream, every song, every hope I shared with you, you appropriated. For who? This is not you. You have drained me.
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sex.
stuffandshit:
I’m not a misogynist; I’m just male chauvinist.
I regard women as my equal and act as such. I do however idealize an aesthetic I believe to be classically masculine. I like motorcycles, leather, and reckless behavior. I dream of the age when a man had a vested interest in his image not because he was “metrosexual” but because he had some personal pride. The age when a man didn’t...
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I’m crumbling under the weight of the distance between us. I miss you more and more each day.
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Now that I think about it, 2010 wasn’t really that bad, and it is ending just fine.
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So Contagious by Acceptance.
Anyone remember this...
I am sorry for doing that but I am not sorry for a single thing I said.
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First Love by the Maccabees.